Today was kinda just a boring day,, I studied (for the first time in ages) and I didn't rlly do much else, except for work out ofc.

I came back from school and felt so exausthed, I guess the excitement of yesterday put an emotional toll on me. I started missing her like hell and I kinda just rotted until the night came, but I decided to write this to keep my mind off things.

I was on webfishing talking with someone about love and loneliness, and they said that the ability to be loved by others first starts with the ability to love oneself. I've heard it before, but I usually just scoffed at it. This time it got me thining.

Do I love myself?

I'm not quite sure, honestly :/ I think I love certain aspects of myself, the aspects that are always loved by others. Like, everyone always says I'm smart, so I love that about myself. I also love my artistic side, it makes me feel good about myself and it gives me purpose. However, there are also things I hate about myself: I hate how I look, I hate how I acted in the past, I hate how alone I feel. I also am trying to figure out if this loneliness I feel might also stem from a lack of self-love. Who knows!

I'll just hug my blahaj until I figure it out.

Todays recommendation is... Snowing by Sprain ♡